How to Bend Without Breaking
Life has a way of testing us, doesn't it? Whether you're facing a sudden crisis at work, juggling the endless demands of motherhood, or simply navigating a particularly heavy season, pressure is inevitable. But here's what I've learned: it's not about avoiding the pressure—it's about how you respond to it.
You Don't Have to Be Unbreakable
Someone once told me I was "anti-fragile"—like that vase you could throw off a counter and it somehow wouldn't break. While I appreciate the sentiment, the truth is, I fail a lot. I take messy action. There are days when I'm messaging my team asking, "How are we going to do this?"
But here's the thing: I keep going. I haven't allowed the pressure to break me. And that's exactly what you need too—the ability to bend instead of break.
Feel the Feelings (But Don't Get Stuck There)
The first step to handling pressure isn't to power through or ignore your emotions. It's giving yourself permission to feel. Acknowledge the fear, sadness, or frustration. Sit with those feelings without judgment.
But here's the crucial part: you don't think your way through feelings—you act your way through them. When we overthink, we spiral into worst-case scenarios instead of focusing on moving forward. Feel the feelings, then take action to avoid getting paralyzed.
Step Into Your Most Empowered Self
When pressure mounts, it's easy to feel small and powerless. That's when I ask myself: "How would the best version of me handle this situation?"
I think back to moments when I surprised myself with my own strength—standing on stage before competing, knowing I'd already won regardless of the trophy, or returning to American Ninja Warrior after tearing my ACL. That person who showed up consistently, humbly, through all the tough times? She's still within me, especially during the hardest moments.
Take One Small Step
You don't need to fix everything right now. You don't need to see the full path forward. All you need is one small, actionable step.
Facing a work crisis? Focus on one task that moves the project forward. Overwhelmed as a parent? Take five minutes to breathe and identify what's truly urgent. Feeling lost? Start by journaling or reaching out to someone you trust.
Remember this: Action creates momentum, and momentum creates clarity.
My ACL Comeback Story
When I tore my ACL on Ninja Warrior, everything I'd worked for felt like it was slipping away. I was angry, sad, and scared. But instead of staying stuck in those feelings, I stepped into an empowered mindset and asked, "What can I control right now?"
My answer wasn't "I'm going to get back on the course next year" (though that was the goal). It was "I'm going to get my knee to bend again after surgery." One exercise. One step. Then walking on one crutch instead of two. Those small actions added up to a massive comeback.
Your Bend-Don't-Break Action Plan
- Acknowledge your feelings - Name what you're feeling and let yourself feel it without judgment
- Step into empowerment - Visualize your most empowered self and ask what they would do
- Take one step - Identify one manageable action you can take right now
- Reflect and adjust - At the end of each day, note what worked and use it as feedback
The Truth About Pressure
Pressure doesn't have to break you. It can bend you, shape you, and make you stronger if you let it. Every time you choose to move forward—even with just one small step—you're building resilience, strength, and confidence.
Feel your feelings, but don't stay stuck in them. Take action, even if it's tiny. And remember to keep asking yourself: What if it all goes right? What if it's already going right?
Keep growing, keep showing up, and keep bending—but never breaking.
