Why are we always rushing?
I had a conversation with a friend recently that stopped me in my tracks. We were talking about how we're all constantly in a hurry—wanting everything to happen now, or even yesterday. She said something that hit me like a ton of bricks: "If you're living in the future, you're living in anxiety. If you're living in the past, you're living in depression."
That quote (which I'm pretty sure is from Brianna Wiest) made me realize I've been living in a constant state of rush lately. As I'm shifting gears with my business, my podcast, and my mission to help more women achieve their first pull-up, I've been so focused on the destination that I'm missing the beauty of the journey.
The Truth About Why We Rush
For high performers like myself, the rush usually comes down to a few things:
- High expectations: We set big goals and feel like failures if we're not achieving them fast enough
- Comparison: We look at others who seem ahead and wonder, "Why am I not there yet?" (forgetting we don't know what chapter of their story they're on)
- FOMO: We're terrified that if we don't move fast, we'll miss our chance
But here's what I've learned: rushing doesn't actually get us there any faster. It just makes the journey infinitely more stressful.
The Traffic Jam Revelation
My godfather once told me about being stuck in traffic and watching someone completely lose it in their car—honking, yelling, the whole nine yards. His observation? "You're not going to get there any faster by stressing about it right now."
That's when it clicked for me. When we live in the future, constantly thinking about what's next, we disconnect from the present moment. We worry about things that haven't even happened yet. We feel like we're failing if we're not already at the finish line, but we miss the small wins, the lessons, and the joy that's happening right now.
What Changes When We Stop Rushing
When I started practicing patience with myself, everything shifted. I began giving myself grace to grow at my own pace. I focused on the process instead of obsessing over outcomes. I felt more grounded and connected to who I am right now, not who I think I should be by some arbitrary deadline.
Think of it like climbing a staircase—you can't jump to the top without tripping. You have to take it one step at a time, and when you focus on each step, you realize how much progress you're actually making.
My Go-To Tools for Staying Present
When I catch myself rushing or feeling anxious about the future, I use these simple but powerful tools:
- Practice mindful awareness: I look around and name what I see—"blue sky," "green tree." My therapist taught me this, and it instantly brings me back to the present.
- Focus on what I can control today: Instead of overwhelming myself with the big picture, I ask, "What's one small thing I can do today to move forward?"
- Celebrate small wins: I don't wait for major achievements to feel proud. Washing my face every night? That's a win. Showing up for this podcast consistently? Another win.
- Practice gratitude: Every morning and evening, I write down three things I'm grateful for—especially when I'm feeling overwhelmed.
- Set boundaries around my goals: I remind myself it's okay to move at my own pace. There's no universal timeline I need to follow.
- Journal through anxious thoughts: When future-focused anxiety creeps in, I write it out and ask myself, "What's really within my control right now?"
The Permission to Not Have It All Figured Out
As I navigate this current transition in my life and business, I keep reminding myself: it's okay to not have everything figured out right now. Nobody really knows what they're doing—I've talked to incredibly successful people who admit they're just trying their best too.
The steps I'm taking today are leading me exactly where I need to go, even if I can't see the full picture yet. These "stuck" moments are often exactly what I need to grow to the next level.
Your Reminder to Slow Down
If you've been feeling rushed, anxious, or stuck in future-thinking, take a deep breath right now. You don't have to do it all right now. As a past coach told me: "You can do it all, and you're going to do it all—just not right now."
Focus on today. Celebrate your wins. Trust that the steps you're taking are leading you exactly where you need to go.
Everything is happening right on time, exactly as it should.
What if it's all going right already?
